Lloyd recieved the title of Mr Oblivious!
by accident prone
Summary: Because Lloyd's that dumb. Who knows, maybe it's genetic. Lloyd/Zelos and a very slight amount of Yuan/Kratos. My attempt to create one of these that stays true to the characters. Rated T just in case. COMPLETE!
1. the Coliseum

**Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia. Or its characters. Or anything. I do however own my writer's block for my other story…**

**A/N: I love the Zelos/Lloyd pairing to bits. But reading the stories with it, it looks like in most of them, Zelos is all too close to a rapist. And what's with the crap of Lloyd always getting bottom? Yea, so I decided to see what I could do about that. I'm trying to stay true to their characters so…please let me know how I'm doing.**

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"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter one: the Coliseum.**

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"It totally smashed me into the ground!" Zelos pouted. "My beautiful face!"

"Shut up," Lloyd said. "Professor, you can heal him, right?"

Raine sighed. "I don't think he needs…"

"You don't think I need healing?" Zelos sputtered. "Come on! I thought I was going to die! When it started spitting those fireballs at me…" He shuddered. "I'm maimed. I may never look as gorgeous as I once did again! It's a terrible tragedy for the world!"

Lloyd rolled his eyes. "So, are you all right or aren't you?"

"Do I _look_ all right?"

"You're never all right," Genis piped up.

"Shut up, brat."

"Damages to Zelos's body appear to be close to nothing," Presea said. "Chances of death or permanent injury…approximately zero percent."

"What about scars?" Zelos pleaded. "I don't want my beautiful body marred, you know!"

There was dead silence.

"I'm not feeling the love…"

Lloyd rolled his eyes. "At least I was still cheering for you. Everyone else was cheering because they liked seeing the Dragon Knight smack you across the floor with its axe."

"Aw, come on. That was painful, man…"

"The point is, I was still cheering, okay? I said I would. Even after you got smacked into the wall and started crying."

"I wasn't _crying_! I was…laughing."

"Sure, sure. Whatever." Lloyd stood, obviously trying hard not to laugh.

"It's not _funny_," Zelos said indignantly.

"Look, Zelos, I'll show you how it's done. Besides, someone has to earn back the money you lost." Lloyd stood up and registered himself in the Advanced Singles Match. "Just you wait."

"You think you can win? When the Great Zelos Wilder failed?"

Lloyd rolled his eyes again. "You got smacked by an axe, Zelos. I think I can probably do better than that. Besides, you're _slow_."

"I'm not slow!"

"And it looks like you're dancing in the middle of battle. At least I _look _like I'm fighting."

"It's my natural agility!"

"You're not supposed to dance when you fight!"

"It keeps them from knowing where I'll be next."

"The Dragon Knight got you pretty well."

"That's different. Its axe was bigger than I was."

"Whatever. I'll still get farther than you ever will."

Lloyd's name was called and he moved to go inside.

"Hey! Lloyd!"

Lloyd glanced back. "Yeah?"

"Uhh…" Think of something to say. Anything. Like…good luck. Or you can do it. Or…or…damn, he was drawing a blank. He suddenly blurted, "put on a show that will make me fall in love."

"Yeah!" Lloyd agreed, proceeding through, oblivious of Zelos smiting himself on the head repeatedly, wondering what in all the levels of Niflheim had possessed him to say _that_.

Sheena immediately smacked him.

"Ow!"

"Don't be creepy towards Lloyd!" she snarled.

"Ow…Why? Would you prefer I was creepy towards you?"

She smacked him again, and he fell to the ground.

"Just leave Lloyd alone!" she said, then stalked off.

"I thought I was gonna die again…"

"Maybe you could stop being so weird, then," Genis suggested, seeming almost…civil.

"All I said was…"

"Something that could be easily misinterpreted," Regal finished, also glaring at the ex-Chosen.

"Oh…come on. You know Lloyd. Even if someone was in love with him and told him flat out, he wouldn't notice."

Colette was suddenly flushing and finding the ground very interesting. "No kidding," she muttered to herself. Still, Zelos heard it, and he felt his eyes narrowing before he could wonder why.

"Chance of Zelos falling in love with Lloyd and Lloyd noticing…approximately two percent."

"That much?" Yuan asked, suddenly popping up from nowhere as he so often did.

Zelos screamed a very high-pitched scream, then cried, "Don't _do _that!"

"You scream like a girl."

Zelos crossed his arms and turned away, grumbling. He didn't_ scream_ like a girl. He didn't_ dress_ like a girl. And he most certainly didn't _look_ like a girl!

"He's fighting the Dragon Knight," Yuan noted.

"Avenge my honor, Lloydie!" Zelos screamed out towards his friend.

Lloyd gave him a 'yeah, yeah' look from below, then gripped his swords more tightly and faced the dragon that was easily ten times his size, appraising it carefully.

Zelos watched the red-clad swordsman, chin on his hands, somehow unable to pull his eyes away. The way Lloyd would move around the huge monster, taking every opportunity that presented itself, no movement wasted, and—

"Kratos won't be happy when he notices you're leering at his only son, Zelos," Yuan said in a singsong voice barely quiet enough to not be overheard.

Zelos flushed. "Sh…shut up! I'm not leering!"

"Still, I can't blame you. He is pretty hot…kind of like his father." Yuan then fell into a dreamy silence.

"Are you in _love _with _Kratos_?"

"Me? No. No, not at all. Why would you say that?"

"No reason…"

"Exactly. No reason. No reason at all."

"Is that why your eyes are going all shifty?" Genis asked, sliding up and looking at the angel. Zelos had a minor panic attack as he wondered how much the young mage had heard.

"What are you talking about? My eyes aren't shifty."

"Sure. And Zelos wasn't leering at Lloyd."

"I WASN'T LEERING!"

Everyone turned to stare at them. Genis had a smirk on his face. Yuan looked amused.

"At….at Sheena, I mean."

"Creep!" Sheena yelled, smacking him upside the head with her Money Bag from Luin.

"Ouch!"

"Will you all please be silent?" Presea said, sounding almost irritated. "I cannot hear the announcer."

They fell silent, and Zelos decided it was far too dangerous to look at Lloyd, so he looked at the Dragon Knight. It didn't stay that way for long, though. Before he knew it, he was staring at Lloyd again.

_Well, I might be watching his technique. To see why he's doing so much better than I did. But I'm NOT leering!_

Really. Honest.

The Dragon Knight suddenly spat a steady stream of fire at Lloyd, forcing him back. It continued to spit its fireballs of doom at him, then smacked him into the ground with its unnaturally long and giant and evil axe (also of doom).

"That's what got me," Zelos said, but no one seemed to care.

Lloyd forced himself up and unleashed a Double Demon Fang before the axe could hit him again. The Dragon Knight exploded as monsters always seem to when they're killed. Lloyd grinned his idiot grin as he managed to stumble off the Arena floor.

"Told you I'd do it," Lloyd said smugly.

"Bud!" Zelos suddenly hugged Lloyd. "I thought you were going to die!"

"Aaack! Can't…breathe…"

"Zelos," Raine said impatiently, tapping him on the shoulder with her staff. "Let Lloyd go so I can heal him."

"Oh, so you'll heal him, but not poor little old me? I feel so alone…"

"Are you usually this dumb or do you have to work at it?" Yuan asked.

"Ouch…"

Kratos entered and opened his mouth to say something when Yuan let out a squeak.

"Is there a mouse in here?" Sheena asked.

Raine looked around nervously. "M…mouse?"

Yuan suddenly started doing some stuttering that would have put Genis to shame.

"Yuan," Kratos said, sounding almost concerned. "Your face is red. Do you have a fever?"

Yuan let out a high-pitched wail and ran off in the other direction. Kratos gave the retreating Renegade a confused look that had been seen on Lloyd's face all too often.

"So, old man!" Zelos said, feeling the need to force some cheerfulness into all this. "What brings you here?"

"An old friend—Will Raynard—sent me here to get a sample of a Dragon Knight." Kratos sounded vaguely irritated. "Apparently one of the last remaining."

"It exploded," Colette said.

"It…what?"

"Lloyd did it!" Zelos said.

Lloyd glared. "Zelos!"

"Well, you did!"

"I wouldn't have if you hadn't told me I couldn't do it!"

"You exploded it?" Kratos said slowly, not looking amused. At all.

"I didn't know it would _explode_. I thought it would just…you know, die."

Kratos groaned and passed a hand in front of his eyes. "Very well, then. I'll find another."

"I am heading home," Presea said.

"Ah…um…me too!" Genis said quickly.

"Whatever. You chumps do what you want. I am off to meet some ladies." Zelos walked out the door. Genis followed him.

"You know, meeting more women won't help you get over him."

"G…get over who?"

Genis fixed him with a level stare, then walked off.

"I WASN'T LEERING, BY THE WAY!"

Yuan suddenly appeared behind him. "Meet me in the Triet Renegade Base."

"Gahhh! Don't do that, I said! It's creepy! Hey, where'd you go?"

The blue-haired Renegade was nowhere to be found. Zelos hook his head and decided to just spend the rest of the day sleeping. It might clear his mind a bit.

He did not leer at men. Especially not at Lloyd. He…_admired _them.

_No! No! I do not! I'm just…sleep deprived._

Sleep deprived. That was it. It was all it was.

Decided and feeling much better, Zelos went home to sleep.

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**A/N: Hehehe! I got a Tales of Legendia reference in here! *ahem* Anyhow. Please review. It'll make me happy.**


	2. Angels can't get drunk

**Disclaimer: I still don't own anything. Shocking, isn't it?**

**A/N: Thanks to everyone for reviewing and reading! It inspired me to actually get this written…so, yeah, if there's anyone out there that hasn't been reviewing, it really will get me to write more quickly…I promise. Reviews help keep the writer's block demons away.**

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"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter two: the Renegade Base**

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Genis was bored. That hadn't been a problem during the journey. Afterwards, when he had been bored, he'd learned some new spells or annoyed Zelos. Unfortunately, there were no new spells to learn. And he was actually warming up to Zelos. In all honesty, he had to blame that on Lloyd. Thanks to the red-clad idiot, Zelos had stopped being quite as annoying. He'd actually started being…tolerable.

Though it was still fun to watch the ex-Chosen try to insist he wasn't leering at Lloyd. Really, Genis couldn't tell why Lloyd was oblivious to Zelos. Even Presea had noticed the change.

His boredom, however, was what had him crouching in a tree, spying on Yuan and Zelos. It was bound to be interesting.

Zelos gave the Renegade leader a look. "Just how much have you drank?"

"My life is over."

"Ah, cut with the dramatics. What do you want with me? I thought my spying was over with."

"I can't even say hi to him!"

Zelos crossed his arms and sighed. "I didn't come here to listen to a sob story."

"We'll make a deal," Yuan said, raising his head.

"I don't want to make a deal with you. I don't even like you."

"No, no, hear me out! If you help me get Kratos, I'll help you get Lloyd!"

There was a deadly silence as Zelos glared down at the angel. "I don't want Lloyd," he said coldly.

"Then why were you leering at him?"

"I wasn't leering!"

"Sure. Sure. And I can have a reasonable conversation with Kratos." Yuan started whimpering again. "It's not faaaaaaair. Why can't _I_ be in denial?"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Is that all you wanted?"

"Waaaaaaaaaah!"

Zelos, apparently decided to take that as a 'yes,' left. Genis frowned. That hadn't been too interesting. He had to find something to do.

Suddenly a wicked grin grew on his face. He quietly jumped down from the tree and ran inside the Renegade base before the door closed.

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"No," Yuan mumbled. "Not the socks."

"Yuan," a bratty, annoying voice cut in.

"DAMMIT, BOTTA, I TOLD YOU TO KEEP THE SOCK MONKEYS AWAY WHEN I'M DRINKING!"

The brat stared at him. Yuan pressed both hands to his head. "No…wait. Botta's _dead_."

"Newsflash."

"Shut up, brat." Yuan groaned. "I need to find a way for angels to get drunk. As it is, I'm going to have a hangover without the joy of getting completely wasted."

"Why does everyone call me a brat?"

"Because you are a brat. Now get out!"

The brat didn't move. "My _name _is Genis and I'm smarter than you, Botta, and all the other Renegades put together."

"Special for you. Now go away. I need to drink."

"Why? If you don't get drunk…"

"I might get lucky." He peered at the bottle he'd been drinking from. Empty. Damn. He reached for another.

"Or, you could team up with me and I could help you get Kratos. And I could help you make Zelos come out of denial."

Yuan felt a strange jumping up and down in his stomach and concentrated for a few minute on not throwing up. "Why would you do that?" he asked slowly.

Genis shrugged. "I'm bored. I don't have anything better to do."

"Hmph. Like a brat like you would know anything about this."

Genis looked annoyed. "You know what the biggest thing in your way is?"

"The fact that I can't talk around him?"

"It definitely contributes."

"Well, what do you plan to do for that?" Yuan snapped. "Record my voice for every possible thing he could say and just push the 'play' button if he talks to me so I don't have to talk?"

"I had a better idea in mind, actually." The brat's voice betrayed just how dumb he thought Yuan was.

"Oh really."

"Practice breathing."

"I breathe all the time!" Yuan said indignantly. "I don't need practice."

"Well, you don't breathe around Kratos. If you don't breathe, you can't talk. And you feel lightheaded. And when you do talk, it sounds squeaky."

Yuan said nothing, glaring at Genis, but seeing the half-elf's point.

"So whenever you want to talk to him, you have to concentrate on breathing. Got it."

"I'll try it."

"Ah, yeah, one last thing. When you're talking to him, _don't _think about how good he would be in bed. Or how much you want to kiss him. Or what he would look like naked. It'll make it harder to concentrate."

Maybe that was the problem.

"Why are you helping me?"

"Because I want to know exactly how you plan to get Zelos to admit he's gay."

"Why do you care about it?"

"Well, one, I've run out of things to laugh at him about. And two…" Genis hesitated, then said, "Because I can."

"Really…"

"You said it yourself. Zelos was leering at Lloyd."

"Hmph. And?"

"So what would be the best way to make him admit he's gay?" Genis looked at him patiently.

"Kill Lloyd!"

"No! Besides, Kratos would kill you if you did that."

"Oh yeah…"

"No, I'm thinking of something similar, but less drastic."

"_Torturing _Lloyd."

"Not quite…" Genis sighed. "I'm going to have to explain this right out, aren't I?"

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**Lloyd: What are they going to do to me?**

**Me: Get out of my head.**

**Genis: Something evil. It is, after all, a nefarious plan.**

**Lloyd: I blame you.**

**Me: Me?**

**Lloyd: YOU wrote this!**

**Me: Oh…well…wow, look at the time! –-runs away—**

………**yeah, I'm lame. Review anyways?  
**


	3. Nefarious Plan

**A/N: Hey, guys! Thanks for the reviews! You guys are awesome…and I apologize for any Yuan OOC-ness in advance. It just seemed to happen.**

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"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter three: the Nefarious Plan **

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"Hey, Yuan," Zelos said, striding past. "Have you seen Lloyd?"

"No. NO! I haven't! Don't kill me!"

Zelos turned to stare at the electric-blue haired angel.

"I really have to go," Yuan said frantically, backing up quickly. Into Kratos.

"Look where you're going," Kratos said.

Yuan let out a high pitched sound and turned around. "I'm breathing," he said in a squeaky voice.

"That's good to know."

"It was Genis's idea. It was a good idea."

"Ah." Kratos looked like he didn't know quite what to think. "Breathing…is often wise, yes."

"And I'm not thinking about you being naked. That was his idea too." Yuan clamped a hand over his mouth. "Pretend you didn't hear that! I didn't mean it!"

"Then you _are _thinking about me being naked?" Kratos looked a little horrified. About as much as his stoic face would allow.

"No! I'm not! Aaaaaaaaaaaaugh!" And the angel ran off in the other direction. Kratos stared after his old friend, looking confused.

"Is he thinking about me in creepy ways or isn't he?" Kratos muttered. "I don't get him."

"Eh, who knows?" Zelos shrugged. "Who cares? By the way, have you seen Lloyd around?"

"No. Why?"

"Oh…no reason."

"Hmm." Kratos surveyed Zelos with narrowed eyes. Zelos gave a little wave and tried very hard to escape that deadly glare. He finally managed to get away.

Lloyd's father was scary. A good reason to not be lusting after the idealist. Not that he was, of course. Or had ever. Or ever would.

Wandering around town, he finally spotted another of Lloyd's friends.

"Hey, brat!" Zelos called out. "Have you seen Lloyd?"

Genis turned around, looking visibly annoyed. "What do you want?"

"Have you seen Lloyd?" Zelos repeated.

There was a quick smirk that Zelos almost missed. Genis quickly smoothed out his face. "No," he said, too innocently.

Zelos's eyes narrowed. "Are you sure?"

"Mhm…hey! Isn't that Sheena coming over here with her shirt off?"

"Don't change the subject."

Genis smirked again. "You didn't even jump at that? Oh, boy. You must really be head over heels for him."

Zelos sputtered. "What are you…I am not!"

"Uh huh. Suuuuuure. Anyways, I'm sure _Colette _would know where Lloyd is."

"Glad to hear it," Zelos said flatly, turning away.

"Ooooh, you're jealous, aren't you?"

Zelos's left eye twitched.

"You _are_ jealous!"

"Brat, don't make me kill you. I'm not in love with Lloyd."

He walked away as quickly as he could, ignoring the cackling behind him. Colette, huh? As much as the ditzy blonde annoyed him sometimes, he really did want to find Lloyd.

After almost an hour of searching, Zelos was feeling decidedly grumpy about all this.

Fifteen feet above him, Yuan was floating on his pink (sorry—_lavender_) wings, holding a piece of paper in his hands.

"Just drop it!" Genis hissed from a nearby tree. "If you wait too long, he'll miss it. Or worse, he'll notice it."

"Maybe we could just give it to someone and they could give it to him…"

"Don't be a wimp. Here, I'll do it." Genis snatched it and threw it at Zelos. It promptly hit him in the head.

"Ow!"

"There, we're done. How hard was that? Now let's get out of here."

"Hmph."

Zelos glared at the paper that had a rather large rock stuck to it. Damn rock. He considered the paper and realized that someone might want him to read that. So he bent down and read it.

_To Zelos:_

_Hi! I'm Colette! And you know me. Remember me? I'm the ex-Chosen of Sylvarant! I'm weird, freaky, and ditzy. And blonde. Anyways, I was jealous because Lloyd LIKES YOU LOTS and kidnapped him. So you have to come and rescue him. Oh, and don't get jealous. All I want to do is bear seventeen of his children. Well, toodles!_

_From Colette_

_P.S. VERY IMPORTANT! THIS WAS NOT WRITTEN BY GENIS OR YUAN! IT WASN'T! IT WASN'T! IT WASN'T! IT ALSO WASN'T USED TO MAKE YOU REALIZE YOU'RE GAY!_

Something seemed remotely suspicious about this thing.

'" I'm weird, freaky, and ditzy?'" He read. '"And blonde.' What the hell is this thing? 'I kidnapped him.' Hah, right, like she's smart enough to do that!" And then something caught his eye. "'All I want to do is bear seventeen of his children?!' What the hell?"

'"This was not written by Genis or Yuan,"' he read. And sighed. "How long will it take for them to realize I'm not gay?"

Nonetheless, he decided that he definitely had to return the rock to them. Much in the same way he had received it. Cackling maniacally, he ran over to the Renegade Base.

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"What could possibly go wrong?" Yuan scoffed. "The note wasn't suspicious at all!"

"Uh huh. But you wrote it, didn't you? I'm a little worried about that."

"Why?"

"Need coffee," Lloyd mumbled, walking into the room like a zombie. Genis and Yuan didn't notice.

"Well, for one thing, you're even dumber than Colette and Lloyd put together."

"You impudent—"

"Coffee," Lloyd said, grabbing Yuan's cup and drinking.

"What are you doing up?" Yuan snapped. "The tranquilizer was supposed to keep you out for at least five hours."

"Need more coffee."

There was a crash in the other room. Genis and Yuan looked at each other and went to see what it was.

It happened to be Raine.

"FACINATING!" she gasped. "An ancient artifact! Right here…I wonder how old it is…hmm."

"Raine," Genis said awkwardly.

"Oh, to hold the smooth stone in my hands…this is heaven! I could die happy right now!"

"Good," Yuan said with a noise of rage, summoning a ball of lightning in his hand.

"Wait!" Genis said. "You can't kill my sister, Yuan!"

"Why not? Look what she's done to my stack of pictures of Kratos fanart!"

The treasured pictures were strewn across the ground. Genis rose a brow at the mass of them and bent down to look at them. "Yuan, did you draw these? They're actually pretty good."

Yuan reddened. "N…no! Of course not! Why would you think that?"

"Well, it does say, 'By Yuan' on them."

"W…well, I'm sure there's another Yuan out there who's obsessed with Kratos."

Genis picked up one of them. "What's this one?"

"Ah! No! Don't look at that one!"

"Why n—aaaaaaugh! My eyes! It burns! Get it away!" Genis cried, covering his eyes and trying to get the disturbing images out of his head.

"Some of these are intended for _mature _audiences."

"Freak!!"

Yuan picked up his treasured Kratos fanart tenderly and whispered, "I'll never let anyone hurt you again, my babies."

"My eyes…"

"I'll lock you up in a tower so no one but me can gaze upon your infinite beauty."

"I think I'm gonna throw up…"

"Shut up!" Yuan snapped, throwing the fanart in a random cupboard and standing up. "They're gone now. Are you happy?"

"Really gone?"

"Yes."

Genis slowly uncovered his eyes. "Okay. Then, where were we—ahhhhhh!"

"Oops. Except that one." Yuan quickly stuffed it inside his cape.

"O…oh my g…g…"

"Oh shut up! It wasn't that bad."

Genis whimpered. "I never want to see anything like that again…"

"Look, it's gone now, okay?"

"Such marvelous luster," Raine murmured.

"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Yuan bellowed, suddenly remembering she was there.

"Hmm?" Raine looked up. "Yuan, you're here?"

"This is my house! I _live _here!"

"I see." She stood up. "Do you have any other marvelous artifacts?"

"Better do what she says," Genis whispered. "She's in Ruin Mode."

"What mode?"

"Just do what she says!"

"How bad can it be? She can't have my…"

"Seriously, Yuan, if you value your life, do what she says."

Yuan rolled his eyes. "This way." He led her into the main room of the base. "On the walls are some—"

"FANTASTIC!"

He took a few steps away, watching her warily.

"Say, Yuan, would you happen to know anything about this?" Zelos's voice came from behind him.

Uh oh. All their plans would be ruined if Zelos saw Lloyd. He gave Genis a look, and Genis quickly yanked Lloyd into the other room, saying, "Look, coffee! Over here, Lloyd! Quick!"

"Know anything about what?" Yuan asked.

"This note," Zelos said calmly, handing him the note. Yuan looked at it.

"It looks like it's from Colette."

Zelos tapped his foot against the ground, frowning. "Are you sure? It seems awfully…suspicious."

Raine, coming out of Ruin Mode, came over and looked at it. "This was not written by Yuan or Genis?" she read. "That's very…blatant."

"I've never seen it before it my life," Yuan said.

"It does seem that Lloyd disappeared. It's possible that Colette did kidnap him," Raine said.

"What?" Zelos and Yuan cried at the same time. Zelos looked at Yuan, who said immediately, "Uh…I mean…that's what I thought, too!"

"Hmph…she kidnapped him?" Zelos was silent for a moment. "Where'd she go to?"

"Uh…" Raine was taken aback. "Who knows? I can ask the Mizuho information network if you want…"

"No, I will. Don't worry about it."

"I insist. I will."

"Raine…" He narrowed his eyes. "Why are you being so…"

"You should go home. Immediately."

Zelos looked like he was about to argue, then shrugged and left.

Yuan turned to Raine. "Why did you do that?"

"What, you mean lie to him about who kidnapped Lloyd? Because I can," she said simply. "Besides, did you really think he'd be fooled by that letter?"

Yuan glanced down at it. "I would have been…"

"Then you're an idiot. Now, excuse me. I need to talk to Sheena about this."

"Talk?" Yuan echoed. Raine colored ever so slightly.

"A…anyways, I'd better go now!"

The half elf ran out of the room. It was only later that Yuan realized she'd been clutching the vase in her hands when she left. It was probably gone forever now.

**A/N: Ehhh…not my best work. Hopefully you guys will keep up with the reviews...**


	4. Contemplation walk

**A/N: Uh…yeah, sorry for the randomness last chapter…I have no idea how that happened. It was late. I had semi-writer's block. Dangerous combination. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and convincing me I don't suck too much. You guys are amazing.  
**

**Anyhoo, next chapter. I'm not sure I like it as much as I do the others, and it's severely lacking in humor, but it is sort of necessary to advance the story. More humor next chapter, I promise! And...I still don't own Tales of Symphonia.**

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"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter four: Contemplation Walk**

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It was late, and Zelos was having one of his "Contemplation Walks."

The note had seemed more than a little…strange. It didn't seem like something Colette would have written. It seemed like something Yuan would have written. But that Raine had been backing the note up…

He narrowed his eyes. There were a few possibilities here. One was that both Raine and Yuan were lying, and they wanted him to admit he was gay. And that was_ not _happening. Not anytime soon. If this was the case, it also showed that they had far too much time on their hands.

The other possibility was that Colette actually had kidnapped Lloyd. And the problem with the whole situation was that it was impossible to tell what the situation actually was. Either way, Yuan, Genis, and Raine would be standing by the assertion that Colette had kidnapped Lloyd. That meant that the only way to figure out what was actually going on would be to confront Colette.

He frowned. That wasn't something he looked forward to. And coming to that conclusion…it had made for a very short Contemplation Walk. It had been a long time since he'd had one, and he was determined to make this one worth as much as the last one had been.

The last one…it hadn't been too long ago. A year ago maybe? Just before Sheena had left on her assassination mission. Of course he'd been happy that Tethe'alla would be allowed to continue flourishing. He didn't want the beautiful world he'd lived in to become cold and tattered, like Sylvarant had been at the time. But nonetheless, he hadn't been able to stop worrying about Sheena. Of course not. She'd been about as close as someone like him could get to a friend. He'd decided then that he was in love with her. He'd hit on her at every opportunity, both before she left and during the trip. Of course, who could resist? Especially with a body like that.

The two of them had a history. It might be why by the time the journey with everyone else had come along, she had very little faith in him. She seemed to enjoy smacking him upside the head enough, though. Not that he could blame her. He had to admit he'd deserved it.

Even by the time the end of their journey came along, she hadn't trusted him too much. He'd been flattered to hear that she thought he had some good in him, but that she was so easy to fool about his betrayal…that had been a little painful.

But Lloyd…Zelos quickly dismissed that thought. It didn't matter anyways. He wasn't in love with Lloyd.

_Right, so what's the problem of thinking about him? Are you afraid? _The voice in his head was mocking.

Hmph. Of course not. He wasn't gay. In any way. He could appreciate Lloyd without loving him. Besides, thinking about it would prove to Genis—and himself—that he wasn't in love. And he hadn't been leering. Straight people didn't leer at people of their same sex.

Lloyd. The one person who'd actually trusted him, the one person who saw more than what Zelos had showed the world. One of those people with so much to themselves, it was amazing. One of those people that had an infinite number of flaws, but you couldn't help loving them despite it.

Zelos froze. _Uh oh_.

He repeated the thought slowly in his head, dreading it yet being unable to stop himself. _One of those people that had an infinite number of flaws, but you couldn't help loving them despite it._

_No…that's wrong. You don't love them despite it. You love them along with their flaws._

Groaning, he sank down on the bench, covering his face with his hands. That was not supposed to happen. He wasn't gay. He wasn't—

_Okay, so I'm bi. I can live with that. It's just…shit._

His feelings for Sheena had faded, and he'd been so focused on them, he hadn't even noticed the stronger feelings for Lloyd that had been slowly sneaking up on him, pouncing when he hadn't been expecting it. But these feelings he felt for the idealist…they went above and beyond what he'd felt for Sheena.

_Gahhhh, I'm going crazy! I can't believe this! Why do these things have to happen to me?_

He could have seen himself someday winning Sheena's heart. Maybe. But Lloyd's? There was no way. First off, Lloyd was _straight_. Lloyd was probably going to get married to Colette. Not…

Colette. Had she really kidnapped Lloyd?

_If she did, I have to rescue him. If she didn't, I have to kill Yuan, Genis, and Raine._

Either way, it was a win-win situation. For now, though…he had to come up with a brilliant plan to find Colette. And he figured he might as well come up with a brilliant plan to rescue Lloyd, while he was at it.

_I can't think like this. _He groaned and stood, walking towards his house.

_You like Lloyd, you like Lloyd…_the voice taunted him.

"Gahhh!" Zelos wailed, smacking his head repeatedly against a lamppost. "Why me?!"

"Chosen," the princess said, giving him a curious look. "Are you…well?"

"No! No, in fact, I'm not!"

"Do you want to talk about—"

"No," he said firmly. "No."

"Are you—"

Zelos had already stalked off. Angry with himself. Angry with the princess. Angry with everyone who'd made him go on this Contemplation Walk and face the fact that he—Zelos Wilder, former Chosen of Tethe'alla, world class gigolo and philanderer—was in love with a man.

_A very good man, but nonetheless…_

Nonetheless, before rescuing his now-favorite hunny, he'd have to get some rest.

Sighing, he continued his walk back to his mansion, continuing to pity himself.


	5. Rescuing Lloyd

**A/N: It's late again…and you know what that means...POSSIBLE INSANITY! BWAHAHAHAH! Uhh…yeah…*cough* I still don't own anything…there. I've disclaimed. Woohoo…I'm tired now.**

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"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter five: "Rescuing" Lloyd**

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"Your name is Binky!" the girlish giggle-shriek sounded across the Thoda Dock, making everyone within a five-mile radius wince. Zelos turned away from the girl he was flirting with to get enough money to take a boat. Looked like he wouldn't need a boat after all. That shriek could only be one person. Ignoring the indignant _hey! _of the woman behind him, Zelos walked casually up to Colette, trying not to look homicidal.

"Your tail is so _cute_!" she informed the dog, who gave her a _what the fuck? _look.

"So," Zelos said slowly, leaning against a pillar, hands in pockets. "It's been awhile, hasn't it?"

"Oh! Hi, Zelos! Yes, I guess it has." Colette continued petting the dog. "You…have a bit of a scary look on your face. Are you in a bad mood?"

"Have you seen Lloyd?" Zelos demanded, getting to the point.

"Um, no. Why?"

"So you didn't kidnap him."

"Um…no. Why? Was he kidnapped? Oh no! We have to save him! He saved me so many times in the past…"

"Does this note look familiar?"

She read the note he handed to her. "Hmm…maybe there's another Colette just like me!"

"Another Colette who's just as annoying and ditzy as you are and was the Chosen of Sylvarant? I don't think so."

"Oh, well, it can't be Genis or Yuan. It said so on the note. Maybe…it was Mithos?"

"Mithos is dead."

"Oh. Right." She giggled. "Well…I bet it was Botta."

"Botta's dead!" he yelled.

"Then it could have been—"

"Lloyd's been kidnapped?"

Uh….oh. Things just went from bad to worse. Zelos turned slowly, and sure enough, there stood Kratos, radiating an aura of badassness. He backed away slowly, not wanting to be fried by that glare. "Uh…yeah…I think so."

"Let me see the note, Chosen."

"I'm not Chosen anymore," he muttered, but handed the note to him.

Kratos read it, then pressed his hand to his face. "Ugh," he said. "Chosen, come. We have to pay Yuan a visit, I'm afraid."

"Why?" Colette asked cluelessly.

"Because I need to tell him that four thousand year old beings really should be smarter than this." Kratos sighed. "And he still owes me fifty gald. From over three thousand years ago."

"How do you remember something like that?"

"It was for Mithos's birthday present. He got Mithos his spandex suit. It was memorable."

Zelos snickered, then stopped as soon as the glare was directed at him.

"In any case, we should go."

"Okay!" Colette chirped.

"Why me?" Zelos moaned, but followed the two. At least he had Kratos's scary glares on his side.

--------------

"So, wait…let me get this straight. You kidnapped me—_again_—because you seem to think that Zelos was _leering _at me and you want him to admit he's _gay_?"

Yuan and Genis nodded. "Sounds about right, yeah."

Lloyd threw his hands up in the air. "Zelos is the straightest person I know!"

"Uh, Lloyd, not to be offensive, but…you don't really know very many straight people," Genis pointed out.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, I mean, look at everyone. There's Yuan, with his Kratos fanart and his cape."

"What's wrong with my cape?"

"You're a Kratos _fangirl_, Yuan. And then there was Yggdrasill. Didn't you say, 'who's that freaky lady?' when you first saw him?"

"Oh. Uh…"

"And to top it off, Zelos wears pink."

"He says it's salmon…"

"Salmon _is_ pink!"

"Oh."

"You're an idiot, Lloyd."

"I…hey…"

"OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW," the deafening roar came.

"Uh oh," Lloyd said, a little smugly. "Dad's gonna _kill _you."

"Lloyd, what should we do?" Genis asked.

"You should be asking _me_!" Yuan snapped. "It's my base!"

"But Lloyd is the leader!"

"IT'S MY BASE! And I'M the leader!"

"I thought the Renegades disbanded," Lloyd said.

"That doesn't matter!"

"Well, I say we let him in," Lloyd said. "I trust him. Besides, Yuan, he's your friend. He'll probably only maim you."

"We are _not _letting—"

"Too late," Genis said. "I already let him in."

"Ahh! No! Kratos! Don't kill me! We had a good reason!"

Shaking Yuan vigorously, Kratos snarled, "You still owe me fifty gald!"

"Can we talk this over? I kidnapped you son for a very good reason…"

"Hi, Lloyd!" Colette exclaimed, bouncing up and down.

"Lloooooooyd!" Lloyd suddenly found himself tackle-glomped.

"Uh…hi, Zelos…I'm happy to see you, too…"

Genis was snickering in the corner.

"I missed you!"

"Uh…we just saw each other the other day but okay…but, Zelos?"

"Hmm?"

"Would you mind getting off me?"

"Oh yeah."

Colette was glaring at Zelos, but he ignored it in favor of glaring at Genis and snapping, "What's so funny, brat?"

"Oh, nothing. It's just…" He snickered some more.

"Just _what_?"

"It worked! Ha ha! It worked!"

"What worked?" Lloyd asked.

"It did not! I'M NOT GAY! Dammit, brat—"

"You're lying! You're lying!"

Zelos chased Genis out of the room. There was a loud crashing sound, but Colette and Lloyd were used to that sort of thing by now. She fiddled with her shirt awkwardly, then sat down by Lloyd.

"So…"

"Uh…"

They both fell silent.

"I…was just wondering something," Lloyd said.

"Oh…" And somewhere, in the hopeful optimism of Colette's heart, she felt he was going to confess his love towards her, and then they would marry and have seventeen children. And eighty four dogs.

"Do you still have that necklace I made for you?"

"Oh, Lloyd! I feel the same way!"

There was a silence, and they stared at each other.

"Huh?"

"What?"

Another silence.

"I thought…you were going to say you loved me…"

Lloyd looked confused. "Uh, no. Why would I say that? I was just wondering if you still had the—"

"Waaaaaaaaa!" Colette wailed, running from the room.

"What did I do?" Lloyd wondered to himself.

"Uhh…Bud…Colette just ran from the room crying…"

"I have no idea what I did!"

Zelos looked thoughtful. "Well, what did you say to her?"

"I just asked her if she still had that necklace. I wanted to see it and see if it really was that crappy…"

"And she ran from the room crying?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Hmm," Zelos said.

"ZELOS!" the infuriated yell came. "DID YOU THROW GENIS OUT A THIRD STORY WINDOW?!"

"Uh! Raine! I can explain!"

She smacked him upside the head. "NEVER DO THAT AGAIN! GENIS COULD HAVE DIED!"

"Ha-ha," Genis said, sticking his tongue out.

"Shut up, brat."

Ten feet away, Kratos had stopped strangling Yuan in favor of glaring. Not that that was any better.

"We could have tea," Yuan suggested weakly.

"Fine. We need to talk."

"Cups are in the cupboard. So's the tea. Get it yourself."

"Hmph." Kratos disappeared into the other room, and Yuan turned to Lloyd.

"Your father's insane."

"Oh," Lloyd said, scratching his head. "Professor, have you seen Colette?"

"No. Why?"

"I think I made her cry."

"You _think_?"

"Well, I did make her cry. I just don't know why."

"Well, what did you say to her?"

"I just asked her about the necklace."

"I'll ask her about it later," Raine decided. "In any case, Zelos, have you admitted you're gay yet?"

"I'm not answering that."

"That means yes," Genis said. "HEY, KRATOS! ZELOS IS GAY!"

"Sh…shut it, brat! When the hell did I ever say that?"

There was a loud _thump _from the kitchen.

"What was that sound?" Lloyd asked.

"Let's go investigate!" Colette said excitedly.

"Where did you come from?" Genis asked her.

"I decided to come back despite the fact that LLOYD DOESN'T LOVE ME…"

Everyone looked at Lloyd, but he wasn't there. He had wandered off into the kitchen with Yuan. Sighing at Lloyd's obliviousness, they went into the kitchen as well. Where Kratos lay unconscious on the ground. The cupboard was open, and a few papers fluttered down.

"Oh no!" Yuan cried. "I forgot I put the Kratos fanart in that cupboard!"

"My eyes!" Genis cried again, and ran screaming from the room.

"What the hell are these?" Lloyd wondered, bending down to pick one up. "What's this supposed to be?"

"Ahh! Don't look!" Yuan leapt for it, but Lloyd evaded him, staring at it.

"Seriously. What's it supposed to be?"

"Uhh…Lloyd." Zelos flipped it over. "You had it upside down."

"I had it upside d—OH MY GOD!" Lloyd fell to his knees, retching. "WHY THE HELL DO YOU HAVE THESE?"

"He drew them," Genis said, stumbling in with a cloth tied around his eyes.

"Ohhhhhh god…" Lloyd said, and fainted.

"Lloyd!" Zelos screamed. "Speak to me!"

"Oh no!" Colette cried. "Is he dead?"

"Stand back." Raine took her staff out and began chanting. "Bring back this soul from Purgatory! Resurrection!"

"I don't think he's dead," Zelos said after a moment. "I'm pretty sure he just fainted."

"Ugh…what happened?" Kratos sat up, and Yuan hurriedly finished stuffing his shirt and pants with the fanart.

"You should have seen it!" Yuan exclaimed. "It was a….uhm…a dragon! It just came in and knocked you out!"

"Hmm." Kratos stood up. "And Lloyd as well?"

"Uhhh…yeah!"

"I see." Kratos knelt. "Then what is this in his hand?"

"NO!" Yuan wailed, grabbing the fanart and stuffing it whole in his mouth.

Kratos gave him a strange look. "Why did you do that?"

"Mmmf…hun'ry."

"There's food in the cupboards." Kratos paused. "As I recall, that's not the only thing there was in there…"

Yuan panicked. "'Oo muff haf bin imammiming i'."

"What?"

"You must have been imagining it," Raine translated.

"Hmm."

"Oh, man," Lloyd mumbled into the floor. "What happened?"

"You fainted," Zelos said. "Need any help up?"

"No, I think I'm—"

"I'll help you up, Lloyd!" Colette said.

"I'm fi—"

"No, Colette," Zelos said, standing up. "You're still tired from the Regeneration journey. I'll do it."

"That was almost a year ago!"

"I really don't think I need any—"

"But you're _fragile_, Colette. I'll just…"

"Guys, I'm kind of already up," Lloyd said.

The two Chosen continued their arguing. After a few minutes, Lloyd got bored and decided to leave. Genis and Raine followed, which of course left Yuan to hope his fanart didn't fall out of his clothes.

Five minutes later, Zelos and Colette looked up. "Where'd Lloyd go?" Colette asked.

"He left," Kratos said.

"…oh."

Zelos stared at the door, then left the base, ignoring Colette's questioning call, thinking that maybe—just maybe—it was time to turn his maximum charm on and hope he could turn Lloyd gay.

**------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**Lloyd: o.O …turn me…what?**

**Me: Ahahaha…never mind, Lloyd, just go over here…you hate spoilers, remember?**

**Lloyd: Why does Zelos have a creepy look on his face?**

**Zelos: Heheheheh.**

**Lloyd: Okay…now I'm just creeped out.**

**Me: Uhh…yeah…anyways, please review, peoples! It only takes like five seconds…even a review like "cool" will make me happy…but I'm not desperate! Well…not totally desperate…sigh.**


	6. Advice

**A/N: Wow, yikes…it's been, like, a week since I last posted. I had writer's block and…laziness. Whoopsies. Anyways, here it is.**

**Disclaimer: Come closer and I'll tell you a secret…I don't own Tales of Symphonia! You already knew? Oh well.  
**

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"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter six: Advice**

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The sight of Zelos sulking in a corner was a sight that could really bring someone's spirits up. Especially Genis's.

Walking casually over to the pink-clad swordsman, Genis said a tad smugly, "So, how did it go?"

"Go away."

"Not well?"

Zelos's glare rivaled Kratos's just then. "Go away, brat."

"If it helps…"

"It doesn't." Zelos crossed his arms more tightly and turned away. "I'm just going to die now, thank you."

"Lloyd probably just didn't notice. It doesn't mean anything."

"Can you _please_ just leave me alone?"

"I mean, he didn't notice that Colette liked him. Or Sheena for that matter."

Zelos settled for glowering at the mage.

"It's kind of funny sometimes, though. 'Lloyd, I really like you!' 'I like you too.' 'Really?' 'Yeah, you're a great person! You're really valuable to me!' 'Oh, Lloyd!' 'You're one of my best friends!' Seriously, it's great."

"It's not."

"No, it is, though. You've been flirting with his for this past _year_ and he hasn't even noticed."

"P…past year? I was not!" Zelos seemed horrified. "…was I?"

Genis nodded. "Yep. Good thing no one noticed." He paused a moment. "You know, I'm lying. Everyone noticed but Lloyd and you."

"_What_?"

"Even Presea noticed."

"_What_?"

"It's true."

Zelos groaned and let his head fall on his folded arms. "This is not cool. What am I supposed to do?"

Genis sat down on the bench. "Well, you have to understand that the thing about Lloyd is that…you know how a lot of people really overthink things? Like, they wonder if whoever said something really meant it, and what they meant by it?"

There was a barely visible nod. "So?"

"Lloyd's exactly the opposite. He underthinks things. If you flirt with him, no matter how much you do, either you'll confuse him or he'll just think it's something you say as a friend."

"Nooo…"

"Yes."

"So what the hell am I supposed to do?"

Genis stood up and started pacing. "That's a good question," he admitted. "You mean one that you can talk yourself out of if it doesn't work out without humiliating yourself?"

"Yeah."

"I'm not sure there is one."

Zelos groaned. "Great. Just great."

"Well, sorry. But Lloyd is just really oblivious."

"Yeah, I kind of noticed."

"I think…" Genis hesitated. Zelos wasn't going to like this. "I think you have to say it right out."

"What?" Zelos's head jerked up, and he looked paler than usual. "I…can't."

"No, listen. You can. It's easy."

"It is not. I can't even say it, especially not to his…"

"Seriously. You just have to look at him in his eyes, like this…" Genis knelt down and forced himself to look in Zelos's eyes. "And say…I love you!"

"Wow, Genis, you're gay?"

"Ahhh!" Genis fell backwards. "Lloyd! No…I'm not…"

"I'm going to die now," Zelos muttered.

"Hey everyone!" Lloyd called, running off. "Genis is in love with Zelos!"

"No no no no no!" Genis chased after his friend. "Lloyd! It's not like that!"

"Just crawl under a rock and dieeee," Zelos whimpered.

Genis was not having a very good time trying to convince everyone he wasn't gay.

"And then he was all like 'I love you!'" Lloyd proclaimed.

"Wow, Genis, and I was always sure you hated Zelos," Sheena said.

"He's a friend! A _friend_! He's gay! I'm not!"

"I do not believe Genis is gay," Presea said slowly. "He must be bi."

"Presea!"

"Oh, yeah, that's right, he liked you," Lloyd said.

"We had a 'date' last night. It was nice." Presea smiled at Genis. "It's all right, Genis. If you really care about Zelos…"

"No! I'm not in love with him!"

"It's all right," Raine said. "We'll still accept you, Genis. You should know by now that everyone on the team is very tolerant."

"I'm not gay!"

"Really? You seemed to have developed quite a crush on Mithos," Sheena said.

"I did not!"

"It's okay, Genis. Sheesh." Lloyd shook his head. "It's fine. You don't have to worry about it."

"I said I'm not—"

"I'm gonna go congratulate Zelos right away!" Lloyd said cheerfully.

"No…this…I'm not…"

"Are you in denial?" Raine asked. "That's perfectly understandable."

"_I'm_ not in denial. Zelos is! Well, he was. But…"

"I could have sworn Zelos was into Lloyd," Regal said thoughtfully.

"He is! I was giving him advice!"

"By confessing your love to him?" Sheena obviously didn't buy it.

"I wasn't confessing my love to him! I was telling him what he should say to Lloyd!"

There was dead silence as everyone gave him skeptical looks.

"I like _Presea_!"

Dead silence.

"I went on a date with her!"

"It was fun," Presea said.

"I want to go on _another_ date with her!"

"Two-timer," Sheena snapped.

"What? No! No, I'm not!"

"You should just decide, Genis," Colette said.

"I have!"

More solemn, disbelieving looks.

Zelos wasn't having much of an easier time.

"Hey, Zelos."

"Lloyd," Zelos mumbled. "Could I…just die now?"

"You dork. Did you really think I'd have a problem with this?"

"That's not what I…"

"I'm glad you two are happy together."

"We're not…"

"I don't think I've ever seen Genis that passionate. You must mean a lot to him."

"That brat would be a great actor," Zelos muttered.

"Huh?"

"I'm gonna cry."

"Huh? You're that happy? Wow…"

"OH MY FUCKING GODDESS YOU'RE SO OBLIVIOUS! I LOVE YOU!" Zelos screamed.

Just kidding. He didn't really. Instead he curled up in the fetal position and pitied himself.

"Uh, Zelos…are you okay?"

"No, Lloyd. I am not okay. I am not okay at all."

"I would've thought you'd be happy. Being with the one you love and all."

"Life is cruel."

"Huh?"

"Can you…" Zelos hesitated, then came to a decision. "Can you meet me in Flanoir…tomorrow? I want to talk to you."

"Sure. Have fun with Genis."

After Lloyd left, Zelos froze. And then he panicked.

"WHAT DID I JUST DO?!"

"Zelos, are you okay?" Genis asked, walking up with the whole crew.

"I'm an idiot! I'm an idiot! I'm an—"

"Not to disagree or anything, but why now?" Sheena asked.

"I'm going to dieeeeeeee…"

"Practice in front of a mirror," Genis suggested.

"I can't do it. I can't believe I just…"

"It could have been worse. You could have babbled like an idiot and then broke down crying."

"Genis did that when he asked me out," Presea said.

Zelos covered his face with his hands. "This is not good."

"No, no. It's very good. You can't back out now. Remember, you'll just have to practice. I'll help you, if you need it."

"So, wait, Zelos is a two-timer, too?" Colette asked.

"I'm not a two-timer," Zelos whined.

"Yeah, he's more like a twenty-five timer," Sheena snapped.

"I am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am n—"

"Shut up," Genis snapped. "Zelos, we're going to the Renegade base and we are going to practice until you get it right."

Raine was seized with a sudden coughing fit. She smacked Genis upside the head.

"Ow!"

"Don't talk like that in front of people!"

"What? I was just…oh, no! I didn't mean _tha_—ow! Sis, stop it! I'm just trying to get Zelos prepared for—no! Don't hit me! Aaaah!"

While Genis was being abused by his sister, Sheena and Colette confronted Zelos.

"So which one do you like?" Sheena asked.

"Why me?" he said.

"You can't have them both, you know," she said.

"I don't want both."

"That you're into Genis at all is surprising," she continued. "I mean, seriously. I would never have expected that."

"ZELOS IS IN LOVE WITH LLOYD! NOT ME! LLOYD!" Genis yelped.

There was dead silence. Again. A few random people gave them strange looks.

"Are you sure?" Regal asked.

"Yes! And I'm not in love with him!"

"Are you sure?" he asked again.

"YES!"

"Ohhh," everyone said.

Zelos whimpered and wondered what he'd done in a past life to deserve this.

"Zelos," Genis said. "You're going to practice, okay?"

"This isn't fair…."

"Life isn't fair," Genis snapped. "Now stop complaining and suck it up. Come on. If you don't want to babble like an idiot when the time comes…"

"Okay, okay." Sighing, Zelos stood. This would in all likelihood be a long night.

**A/N: If you don't review, Yuan's worst fear, the sock monkeys will attack you. Beware! Beware!**


	7. Stick to the script

**A/N: Hi, guys! Chapter seven, here we go! This is kind of exciting, actually. We're now over 10,000 words. That surprises the crap out of me, seriously. I didn't know I'd get this far. It's been kind of a feeling-around-in-the-dark sort of thing for me. Everyone who reviewed during this whole thing is basically awesome.**

**Oh, yeah, and I don't own anything. LAWYERS STAY AWAY!!**

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"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter seven: stick to the script**

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"I think we're making progress. You only turned _pink_ this time, instead of as red as Lloyd's clothes."

"I'm tired," Zelos whined. "I want to sleep."

"Just stick to the script and you'll be fine," Genis said. "And talk loud enough for him to hear you. And don't blush. And don't stutter."

Zelos groaned. "I'll just pretend to be sick."

"Honestly, what is so difficult about this? You flirt all the time. You should be used to this kind of thing."

"That's different."

"How?"

"Well, for one, they're women. For another, they're not entirely oblivious. Not to mention—"

"Concentrate on breathing," Genis said.

"I forget how to breathe when I even think about saying it."

"That's not going to help."

"I'll just go and catch a quick cold."

"You can't put it off forever. Try it again."

Zelos glowered, but looked at the script Genis had written up and muttered, "Wow. It is so beautiful."

"Say it like you mean it."

"I'm working on memorization. Besides, you don't know that Lloyd will say—"

"I've known him longer than you have."

Zelos crossed his arms and muttered something about killing brats.

Genis read Lloyd's line. "Huh?"

"What?"

"That's Lloyd's line."

"Oh."

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand…then you say your next line…"

"I meant your mumble mumble mumble."

"Louder!"

"I meant your…" Zelos flushed, then muttered something inaudible.

"Don't blush!" Genis snapped. "Say it louder! He has to hear it, you know."

Zelos heaved a sigh. "Do I really have to do this?"

"Say it."

"I meant your f-f-f-f-f…gahhh, I can't do it!"

"Zelos." Genis sighed again. "Repeat after me. Faaaaaaaaaaaaace."

"Faaaaaaaaace."

"Now say the whole line."

"I meant your faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace."

"Now you just sound like an idiot."

"This was _your _idea!"

"You were the one who was leering at him!"

"I didn't mean to!"

"You still did!"

"Whatever!"

"Just say the line."

"I meant your face!" Zelos snapped. "There! Happy?"

"Good," Genis said, satisfied. "And then when he looks at you surprised and says 'huh?' you kiss the living crap out of him."

"Okay, okay. Can I go to sleep now?"

"Do it one more time."

"Noooo! I need my beauty sleep."

"You do not. You need practice."

"Vision…going…fuzzy…"

"Oh, stop being so melodramatic. Go through it one more time."

"That's what you said five hours ago…"

"Do it again."

Zelos groaned loudly.

"This shouldn't be difficult for you, you know. You're a good enough actor. You had us all fooled at the Tower of Salvation."

"That was different. I actually have to mean what I'm saying here."

"Just practice again."

Zelos sighed.

--------------

"I'm going to die."

"You're not going to die."

"I think I'm going to throw up."

"That wouldn't make a very good impression on Lloyd."

"I'm going to die."

Genis rolled his eyes. "Just stick to the script and you'll be fine."

"I can't remember it."

"Did you write it on your hand?"

"Yeah…"

"Then look at that."

"I'm wearing gloves."

"Take your gloves off."

"I'll freeze."

"That's why your gloves shouldn't double as sleeves."

"Helpful, brat."

"You'll be fine. Just go and do it. The more time you spend agonizing over it, the more of a wreck you'll be."

"Okay. I'm going."

"Okay."

Zelos stood motionless.

"You said you were going?"

"I can't remember how to walk, talk, or breathe."

"GO!" Genis yelled.

"I'm going, I'm going!"

"Good luck."

Zelos grunted.

--------------

Lloyd didn't even look up as Zelos approached.

"Hey."

"The snow is nice," Zelos said. "I mean, it's cute. I mean, you're cute! No! That's not right!"

Genis groaned and covered his face with his hands, just out of sight. (Yes, he was spying.) "Where did I go wrong?" he muttered.

"Huh? Oh, hi, Zelos." Lloyd looked up then. "How long have you been here?"

"Hi."

Lloyd turned his attention back to the snow silently.

_Let's try this again, _Zelos decided. "It's—"

"It's nice out," Lloyd said. He glanced up. "Sorry. Were you saying something?"

_Just basically exactly what you were saying. _"Uhh…nope. By the way, have you noticed how cute…I mean adorable…I mean handsome…I mean _beautiful_ it is out?"

"Well, I did just say that. Kind of."

_Stick to the script, he says. Stick to the script. He should be telling that to Lloyd, not me_. "Uhhh…yeah! Your faaaaaaaaaaaaaace."

Lloyd gave him a strange look. "What?"

"Never mind," Zelos muttered. "Just…never mind."

"Ooookay…"

This was not going well. Zelos reminded himself to blame this on the brat later. Maybe he'd punctuate some of his points with his dagger.

"So, what made you fall for Genis?"

"That's…" Zelos groaned again and put his head on his arm. "…you're going off-script, Bud."

"Huh?"

_Okay. Improvising time. I can do this. _Raising his head, Zelos said poetically, "Violets are red, and the snow is blue. I am so very glad I did not have to betray you."

"I am, too, but… violets aren't red. And snow's _white_."

"Hey! Are you contradicting the words of the Great Zelos?"

"Maybe I am."

"Hmph." That hadn't worked out too well. Maybe he'd have to be more blunt about it. "So, uh, guess what?"

"What?" Lloyd's voice was wary.

"I'm, uh…gay."

"I would have guessed that. Unless…" Lloyd's eyes widened. "Genis is a girl?"

"What? No! I mean, I don't _think _so…"

"Wow, that's really surprising. I've known him all this time too…I guess I should say her, huh?"

"Uh…"

"That's kind of embarrassing. I wish she'd said something. Wait, so that means…you're _not _in love with him? I mean, her?"

"Well…hmm." This was getting way out of hand. He could just throw himself at Lloyd, but strangely enough, his legs seemed to be failing him. "Uhh….I'm not in love with the brat…but he really is a guy."

"You could have just said so."

"This is boring," Genis whispered to Yuan (who had just randomly shown up.)

"Isn't that Lloyd's line?"

"Well, yeah, usually. But they're not doing anything."

"And what do you want me to do about that?"

"I don't know! Just…mix things up a little, okay? Besides, this is for their own good. Probably."

Yuan sighed. "Fine, whatever. I can probably find something…" He proceeded to search inside his cape, pulling out a variety of objects (which included a cannonball, a teddy bear, a recipe for brownies, several notebooks, and a rock. A boulder, really.)

"What's this?" Genis asked curiously, picking up one of the notebooks.

"Uh! Don't touch that!"

"Why not?"

"Let me put it this way…remember the Kratos fanart?"

Genis made a disgusted sound. "How can I forget it?"

Yuan was staring off into the distance, drooling a little.

"Yuan," Genis prodded. "Hey! Fireball!"

This brought Yuan out of his daze. Unfortunately, it also set the bush they were sitting in on fire.

"Huh?" Yuan said. "What?"

"You were sort of staring off into space."

"Oh. Right. Anyways, the point is, that's basically what's in the notebooks…except, in the notebooks, it's written word."

Genis gagged. "That's disgusting. You need a hobby."

"This _is_ my hobby."

"Ugh."

"Hey does it feel kind of warm in here?"

"Now that you mention it…" Genis looked up, and his eyes bulged from his head. "Fire!"

"What?" Yuan glanced up as well. "Ahhh! When did that happen?"

"Probably when I cast Fire Ball. Run!"

"But…my Kratos notebooks!" Yuan stuffed them in his cape again, along with the teddy bear and whatever else had been in his cape. He gave the boulder one last adoring look, then threw it in Lloyd's general direction. He ran out of the bush.

"I think that might help," he said to Genis, who was staring at his back for some reason. He watched as the boulder smacked into the back of Lloyd's boots and sent the swordsman flying into Zelos's chest, sending them both stumbling.

"Oooh, it worked," Yuan said. "Looks like they're kissing." He glanced back at Genis. "Why are you staring at my back?"

"Your cape is on fire."

"Aaaaah! Nooo! My cape!" Panicking, Yuan ran around in circles.

"Stop, drop, and roll, Yuan!" Genis yelled. "Stop, drop, and roll!"

He honestly…probably…maybe…would have helped the half elf out more, except for the fact that he noticed the binoculars that had rolled out of the cape. He wasted no time in grabbing them and spying on the two swordsmen with them, ignoring the cries of 'ahh, ahh, my cape!'

Lloyd was turning red and muttering, "Sorry, I really didn't mean to do that…really…honest…"

"Uhhhhh…"

_No, no, no, you idiot, don't have a brain fart _now_, it's your chance! _Genis thought, wishing he knew more about telepathy. _You're…in…the…perfect…position!_

Zelos sagged suddenly, left wrist flying to his forehead dramatically. "Oh no!" he cried. "The cold is making me ill! Only a kiss from you, my prince, can save me!"

In his surprise, Lloyd almost dropped Zelos. "Are you sure you're feeling okay?"

"No! No, I'm not! That's why you need to kiss me! Weren't you listening?"

"You're sounding better."

"Oh, but I'm not. Really, I'm not. In fact, I may be dying. Cough, cough."

_That was pathetic. We really should have thought this through better, _Genis thought, groaning.

"Uh huh," Lloyd said dubiously. "Well, I'm sure you'll be fine." He dropped Zelos and walked away. "I have to go. I—"

"Hang on. Hang on just a minute. I think I can actually do this without throwing up right now, okay?" Zelos stood slowly. "You're listening, right? I think I'd actually die if I had to repeat myself."

Lloyd sighed. "Can you make it fast?"

"Well, I can try." Zelos took a deep breath. And then another. And then another. And then—

"I mean it, Zelos. Make it quick."

"I'm in looooooooooooooove with potatoes. No! No! That's not what I meant to say! Dammit! Why can't I do this?!"

"Do what?" Lloyd asked obliviously.

"I mean, I really, really, really like yyyyyams. No!" Zelos smacked his head against the railing. "This isn't working out!"

"Okay. But I really have to—"

"I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU, DAMMIT!"

There was a silence. Lloyd stared at him. "Huh?"

"Urrgh," Zelos groaned, throwing up. "I…did it…"

With that, he fainted and fell over the railing into some bushes. Lloyd stared at where Zelos had been, looking confused and lost.

"Zelos!" Genis shouted, running over. "Are you still alive?"

"Hey…Genis…where did you come from?" Lloyd asked.

"Zelos?" Genis called.

Lloyd looked dazed. "Did…he just really say…"

"Put it out! Put it out!" Yuan screamed, continuing to panic. He was ignored.

"Yep," Genis said. "Although, you could have made it a little easier for him."

"Huh? I'm so confused."

"That's because you're an idiot, you're stupid, and you're oblivious," Genis said cheerfully.

"Hey, shut up! Where'd Zelos go, anyways?"

Genis pointed to where Zelos had fallen. "We should go get him and make sure he doesn't die."

"Oh…yeah…"

As they went down to retrieve Zelos, there was a sudden burst of music.

Lloyd had received the title of Mr. Oblivious.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**A/N: Longest chapter yet! Woohoo! There's probably just going to be one or two chapters left…wow. Anyways, you guys know the drill…I love reviews! Ahahahaha!**

***ahem* Excuse me. Sudden burst of insanity.**


	8. Suspicion

**A/N: Woohoo! Thirty reviews! I looooooooooooooove you guys. Not as much as Zelos loves yams, though. :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't ooooooooooooooooown anything! Except mayyybe my insanity. **

**------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter eight: Suspicion**

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Sheena was starting to feel suspicious about all of this. Things hadn't been right recently.

Sitting under a tree, away from the snow of Flanoir, she considered the facts. Zelos and Genis had actually been friendly with one another, though Zelos had seemed flustered quite a bit. Yuan had been showing up from time to time, much to Zelos's apparent dislike. And then Lloyd had gone missing.

And _then _there was the simple fact that a few days ago, a rumor had started that the two had been kissing, and then Zelos had fallen over the side of the ledge.

Sheena found all this very difficult to believe. Zelos liked women _far _too much to fall for a guy. Besides—she couldn't really see them getting together. First off, ew. The very thought was just revolting. Colette and Lloyd she could see. Herself and Zelos she could see.

_Ugh. _She smacked herself on the forehead. _I did _not _just think that_.

In any case, what was important was…she just couldn't see it happening. Zelos wasn't exactly the kind of person you could trust. The events almost a year ago at the Tower of Salvation had proven that to be true. He'd admitted it, that he'd been deceiving them all along. Though he claimed to be by their side then, and continued to now, everyone had regarded him with a sort of wariness since which had faded some but still remained. Lloyd, it seemed, was the only one who acted as if nothing had changed.

Absentmindedly chewing on the corner of one of her cards, Sheena had to admit that she could see what Zelos might see—_if _the rumors were true—in Lloyd. It was impossible not to like Lloyd. But what Lloyd would _possibly _be able to see in Zelos…well, that just escaped her. What could _anyone _see in Zelos?

"Sheena," Colette's voice came from behind her.

Sheena jerked, then looked back at the girl, forcing a smile. "Yeah?"

"Have you seen Lloyd recently?"

"Hmm, nope. I'll go with you to look for him, though."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I've got nothing better to do." _Except wonder if Lloyd and that idiot really are… _She shook her head. "Come on, Colette, let's go. I'll go left, you go right. Let's meet up farther ahead."

"Okay!"

Walking on the left path, Sheena looked around for Lloyd, hoping that she could find him first so she could ask him about the rumors that had been circling around.

"Whoa!"

She regained her balance just in time, glaring at the offending object—a rock. A boulder. Right in the middle of the path. Grumbling, she moved to toss it out of the way when something on it caught her eye.

**NOT YUAN'S ROCK.**

She narrowed her eyes and decided to hang onto it. She'd barely taken a step when she glanced to her left—and fell to her knees in a coughing fit.

Well. That certainly answered her question about whether or not the rumors were true.

Zelos and Lloyd halted in their kissing juuuuuuust long enough to look at her. Then they continued.

"Oh sweet Martel!" she screamed, still on the ground. "Will you two stop that? You're making me sick!"

"Then go somewhere else," Zelos said, finally pulling his face away from Lloyd's and looking none too happy about it.

"No one wants to see you two practically eating each other's faces," she countered, finally managing to stand, hands on hips. "Get a room or something."

Zelos and Lloyd looked at each other, and she could practically see the gears turning in their heads.

"Oh crap!" A hand flew to her mouth. "I did not just…forget I said that!"

"Room," Zelos said dreamily, chin falling slowly to Lloyd's shoulder. "_Room_."

"Room," Lloyd agreed, and they were off.

"No no no no no no no," Sheena moaned, clutching her head. "Disturbing images…out! Out!"

They did not leave. She groaned and fell to the snowy ground again, wondering why she had to say that.

"Sheena?" Colette asked from above.

"Nooo," Sheena moaned.

"Um…are you okay?"

"Not _those _two…I can't believe this…"

"Sheena? What happened?"

"Nothing!" Sheena snapped, then took a shaky breath. "It's…nothing." Maybe it had just been a hallucination? Maybe…well, she really couldn't imagine Lloyd and _Zelos _getting it on, so it had to be a hallucination, she told herself firmly.

Right?

Ugh, no point in worrying about it now. She stood up again, carefully trying to _not _think about those two in a room together. A room…with a lock…

When she suddenly had another coughing fit, Colette looked over at her, a little concerned.

"Are you sure you're okay? Maybe you should get to the inn…"

"NO!" Sheena screeched. Colette flinched back, staring at her friend.

"Uh, I mean…I'm not tired…"

"Okay!" Colette said cheerily. "Maybe they're in Meltokio!"

"Ugh, it's worth a look."

Colette gave her a curious look before they finally left.

-----------

_THREE WEEKS AGO …_

"_Lloyd," Genis said impatiently, "you're really not getting this, are you?"_

"_My head hurts. I'm confused."_

"_He loves me, he loves me not," Yuan sang, ripping some petals off a flower._

_Genis and Lloyd looked at him, then back at each other. Genis sighed, and ran a hand through his white hair, looking exasperated. "You're _really _not getting this."_

"_Noo."_

"_Okay, then think back. What did Zelos say before he fainted?"_

"_Uhh…" Lloyd's brow furrowed. "He said something about really liking potatoes."_

"_And after that?"_

"_Something about…yams."_

"_And _after _that?" Genis demanded, obviously impatient._

"_Uhm…something along the lines of 'I'm in love with you, dammit.'"_

"_Riiiight. Which means…?"_

"_I dunno. I'm confused now."_

"_How can you possibly be confused? He actually said it right out!"_

"_Oh…yeah, I guess so, huh?" Lloyd scratched his head. "But…it could have been April Fool's day. Or something…"_

"_Lloyd." Genis stood up and grabbed his friend's shoulders, shaking him slightly. "Zelos. Is. In. Love. With. You."_

_Lloyd then turned several shades of red. "H…he is?"_

"_Yes! How could it possibly have taken you that long to figure it out?"_

_Lloyd looked dazed. "But he's…he's…"_

"_Gay," Genis said, a bit more patient this time. "Say it with me, Lloyd. Zelos…is…gay."_

"_Zelos is gay," Lloyd said, sounding bemused._

"_Exactly."_

"_Zelos is gay." He did a double take, then, staring at Genis in shock. "Zelos is _gay_?!"_

"_Mmhm."_

"_Oh…"_

"_Is that all you can say?! Oh?!"_

"_W…well, I can't think of much else to say. It's a lot to get my head around."_

"_Lloyd, Zelos is gay, in love with you, and was leering at you when you were fighting the Dragon Knight. And other times besides. I don't think it can get much clearer than that."_

"_Yeah…yeah, you're right."_

_There was a silence. Genis tapped his foot against the ground._

"_Sooo…what are you going to do about it?"_

_Lloyd looked horrified. "I have to _do _something about it?"_

"_Well, unless you want him to cry himself to sleep every night. And unless you want him to not sleep, eat, or do anything just thinking about it." Hopefully Lloyd wouldn't ask how it was possible to cry yourself to sleep when you couldn't sleep._

"_But what am I supposed to _do_? I've never had to deal with anything like this before!"_

"_Just…tell him how you feel. Look, he almost died trying to tell you that! He stayed up all night practicing! The least you could do is…"_

"_But I can't think, talk, or breathe when I even think about it."_

_Oh boy. _That _was familiar. Genis sighed. "You two are hopeless."_

"_Okay, okay. Just tell me what to do."_

"_Fine. Let's go."_

"_Go? Go where?"_

"_Where do you think, you idiot? To the Renegade base. That's where I helped Zelos out, after all. I might as well do the same for you." Genis glanced at Yuan. "Yuan? You coming?"_

"_He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not…dammit!" Yuan slammed the petalless flower next to the stack of fifty others. "Must…try…again…it was a fluke…"_

_Genis rolled his eyes. "Let's go, Lloyd."_

"_Uh…sure. But Genis? Can I ask you something?"_

"_Sure. What is it?"_

"_Are you a girl?"_

_Genis stared at him a moment, then sputtered, "_What_?"_

"_It just kinda…came up."_

"_I'm not going to answer that! What do you think? Geez, you're an idiot, Lloyd."_

"_Sheesh…I was just asking…"_

_-----------_

"_Dying," Lloyd gasped the next morning. "Genis, I…I can't breathe…"_

_For some reason, Genis chose to give him an exasperated look at that point. "Just go and tell him."_

"_I can't remember what to say."_

"_Do you have the lines written down?"_

"_Yeah, on my hand."_

"_Then read off your hands."_

"_They're covered in gloves, Genis."_

"_Then take off your gloves."_

"_But look at how many snaps and buttons I have to undo!"_

_Genis threw his hands up in the air. "Arrgh, both you and Zelos have to have stupid fashion sense! Just go and do it, already!"_

"_Going, going."_

_Lloyd later learned just how painful it was when Raine got angry at you for making her patients' conditions worse. Or at least that's what she had called it. Zelos had assured him it was worth it, though._

_He also learned that when someone has a broken arm, it's _very _difficult and awkward to lean over it just so you can tell them you're in love with them, too, and to kiss the crap out of them._

_The Professor smacking him on the back of the head sharply with her staff had kind of ruined the moment, though._

_Zelos had flashed one of his grins and murmured "next time," as Lloyd had tried to explain to his teacher that he was just scratching Zelos's nose for him. Yessss, he only had one broken arm, but he was, uh…here he drew a blank, but Genis had helped him out._

"_Zelos is lazy," Genis had said with a smirk._

"_I swear, brat," Zelos had growled. "One of these days, I'm gonna…"_

_Meanwhile, Lloyd had leaned back and relaxed, trying to ignore the suspicious glances Raine was throwing his way._

_And as for what else he had learned…he learned Zelos was a _very _good kisser. Even with a broken arm._


	9. Epilogue

**Disclaimer: Nine chapters. It's the last one. And I still don't own Tales of Symphonia. How lame.**

**A/N: Well, here it is. Last chapter. Sniff…I'll miss writing this soooo much…**

**Anyways, Ranchdressing had some ideas for titles…and I thought they were brilliant…so yeah. Here they are.**

**Zelos received the title of "Love Sick!"**

**Genis received the title of "Love Doctor!"**

**Yuan received the title of "Kratos Obsessed!"**

**Enjoy.**

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"**Lloyd earned the title of Mr. Oblivious!"**

**Chapter nine: Epilogue**

**------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

"Lloyyyyyyd."

"Go to sleep."

"I want toast."

Lloyd scowled and pulled the pillow over his head. "Go to _sleep_, Zelos."

"I want _toast_."

"Sleep."

"Toast."

Zelos yanked the pillow off Lloyd's head, forcing him to meet the morning. He screwed his eyes shut and groaned.

"Lloyd. Who got top last night?"

"Nngh."

"I want my toast."

"Whatever."

"Lloyd, I'd be limping. The _Great Zelos Wilder _would be limping and it'd be all your fault! What would I say? What would I d—"

"If I get you toast, will you shut up?" Lloyd stood slowly, groaning. "What do you like on your toast, anyway? Peanut butter? Jam?"

"Jam and banana."

Lloyd paused, giving Zelos a strange look. "Jam."

"Uh huh."

"And _bananas_?"

"Uh huh."

"You're so weird."

"Look, just get me my toast, okay?"

Lloyd couldn't help but roll his eyes.

"Well, you're up early, Lloyd," Raine said as soon as he walked in the dining room. "It's only noon."

"Have you seen the idiot Chosen?" Sheena asked, irritated. "I haven't seen him all day."

"Noooo…of course not. Um, where're the bananas?"

"Bananas?" Genis stared at Lloyd. "Lloyd, you do know that bananas and jam don't go well together, right?"

"That's what _I _said. But Zelos wants toast."

"He wants breakfast in bed?" Regal asked.

"Zelos is lazy," Presea said.

"Uhh…I'm not sure it's just that…" Lloyd mumbled, finding the bananas and peeling one. "I think he has a…butt-related injury…or something…"

Sheena suddenly smashed her face into her cereal, wailing something about how it _hadn't _been a hallucination. Genis started spewing milk all over the table. Yuan got a knowing smile on his face, and Kratos froze, looking like he wanted to die right then. Raine started choking and had to be Heimliched by Regal. Colette just smiled innocently.

"Oh, that's too bad," she said. "Maybe he fell on a sharp rock?"

"I somehow doubt that," Genis muttered.

"How else can anyone get a butt-related injury?" Colette asked curiously.

"I'll just be going now…" Lloyd started off towards the stairs.

"Lloyd!" Sheena grabbed her friend's shoulders. "You…and Zelos…"

"I'm leaving now," Lloyd said, face somewhat red.

"ARE YOU OKAY?!" she screamed, shaking him. "WHAT DID HE DO TO YOU?!"

"Ahhhhhhhhh!"

"Sheena, you're kind of killing him," Genis said gently, pulling the crazy ninja away from Lloyd. "And think about it. Who has the butt-related injury?"

Sheena looked at Lloyd for a full five seconds before screaming and fainting dead away.

"Maybe that was the wrong thing to say."

"Anyways, I'm going upstairs n—"

"Lloyd," Kratos said, yanking the ribbons on his son's jacket. "You realize you and I are going to have to have a little Talk now, don't you?"

"Help!" Lloyd yelled, trying to free himself without much success. "Anyone, help! Genis?! Sheena?! Colette?! Please!"

"Oh, but, um, if your father wants to talk to you, I think that would be a good thing!" Colette said.

"Muh mouff is full."

"And Sheena's fainted," Raine said, indicating the ninja.

"Someone help! Anyone help! Yuan?!"

"He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me…" Yuan stared at the petalless flower. "He loves me!"

"Uh oh," Genis muttered.

"You loooooooove me!" Yuan exclaimed to Kratos.

"I…er…what?"

Lloyd took the moment of surprise as Yuan latched onto his father to run up the steps to Zelos's bedroom.

Sebastian sighed and began cleaning up the hundreds of little petals on the ground.

"Did you get my toast?" Zelos asked.

"I'm happy to see you too."

"Come on. It's morning. In the morning I like _toast_."

Lloyd pouted, but Zelos only had eyes for the toast.

"Toast?" Zelos pleaded.

"It very nearly had a quick end."

"Good thing it didn't."

Rolling his eyes and puffing in amusement, Lloyd handed Zelos the toast.

"The banana slices are too thick."

Lloyd shoved at Zelos's head in annoyance. "Hey, give me a break! I'm new at this!"

"Don't shove me. I'm injured, remember?"

Lloyd crossed his legs and rested his chin on his hand. "Whatever."

Five bites of jam-banana toast later, Zelos glanced up. "Sooo…do you think they know?"

"What, about your weird tastes in toast? Yeah, I kinda think so."

"No, you idiot. About us."

Thinking back to everyone's reactions to his proclamation that Zelos had a butt-related injury, he replied, "I think they might have a hunch."

**A/N: Yeppies…that's the end. And this**__**is the last note of this story…thanks for reviewing. **

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**Yeah, you guys. All of you. You're great. You guys helped a lot in my first muti-chapter story, so…yeah, you're awesome. I'd give you flowers, but Yuan killed them all. Wow. Almost 1300 hits, 11 story alerts, and 13 favs…ahh, must go celebrate and hyperventilate!**

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